My life feels empty. So empty... I feel like I'm lost. And why does that sound so clichè?

Because you are a clichè

Everyone I cared about, it feels like they have turned their back on me...

That's because they did

Okay, so why do I feel obligated to go back?

Because that's the only life you have, you can't pretend forever

I could stay here. I could have happiness. here. With the people that care aout me and love me for me.

Do they really?

Yes. They were the first people to love me for me. The first. Ever. And they continue to do so, even though i don't deserve it.

Ha, you're beating yourself up for me, I don't have to say much to you at all, because you're picking on yourself

 So why are you still here?

Because I am the part of you that keeps you down to earth, life is pain, you deal with it, without me you would be in eternal bliss, which isn't real

Well fuck off. I don't need you. I can be me here, I can have a life, I can do exactly what I need and what I want here... I can live. I don't have to worry about who I'm hurting, because the people here don't lie, I don't have to worry about putting others first here, because they will remind me that I need to care about myself. And I will never be lonely, because they won't let me. I can be happy here, and you know what? It doesn't matter what happens to me anymore... I just don't care...

You don't care? Well, that's just the right road to self destruction isn't it?

I don't care...

You don't care? Well, why don't you just curl up into the pathetic little ball you call your sanity and die?

You know what? You are going the right way for a severe ass kicking...

Ha, and how are you going to do that? Cut yourself again?

You know what? I don't need this, I don't need you, I don't need Cameron, I don't need anyone from before, all I need is me, and these people here. They care, and that's all that matters to me. I'm going now, and you know what? I'm making a decision that will effect everyone...

At the end of this year, I am moving up here, I will get a job, and then when I'm old enough I will go to the ANU as a mature age student. I don't care aout anything else. All I need is you guys to tell me what to do now... *weak smile*